Since all my difficulties during my childhood years (and some stuff I haven't written about yet as perhaps I'm not yet ready), I have always dreamed of creating a different, much more healthier and positive future for myself- both physically, spiritually and emotionally. In my dreams, I see myself as content and somehow peaceful in myself, not overly fearful or anxious about the future, and just ready to face anything that comes my way. I guess I feel empowered. Sometimes in my dreams I look to the future when one day I may have children (as yet I don't actually know) and in those dreams I like the thought of being healed enough emotionally as to not ever project any negativity or unresolved issues onto my children, and to create a life for them where they will feel happy in themselves, empowered and loved.
For now, I am working on myself and I do think I am making steps in the right direction, although at times it is very hard work, and sometimes I feel I stumble along the way or take a few steps back. But I guess that's all part of learning, and I think generally I am making the kind of progress that I desire. I certainly am being able to think more clearly than before, and to be a little less critical of myself and loving towards me and my inner child. I guess that's all good. At least I hope so!
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